Keep Me Safe
by itsnotametaphor
Summary: War Time, mostly letters. Imagine this taking place in a time of war. D and E are separated and only have the power of writing as a form of communication.
1. Chapter 1

I'd forgotten how to upload chapters, it's been so long.

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"Write to me, please just promise me." He pleaded with such urgency, the look in his eyes screaming for acceptance. She couldn't decline, not with those blue eyes piercing her soul.

"I promise. Although I don't think I would be much help if you get shot at." She could hear the conductor calling out orders, her heart hammered in her chest. He was leaving soon. This enigma of a friend, she couldn't bare him, yet she couldn't bare not seeing him. It was frustrating.

"Just write to me, as much as you can. Promise?" His eyes searched for her acquiescence, she sighed. "I promise. I swear. But you must promise me something as well." She stepped closer. Whether it was knowingly or unknowingly, she closed the distance between their bodies.

"Anything." She could feel his breath on her cheeks, she could count every freckle on his cheeks. "Don't try to hide the pain, please. Don't lie to me. And also don't be boring. And try…" She covered her mouth, her voice hitching as she struggled to stay composed. "Come back safe. Don't get shot at or anything. We still have that dance, remember? You arrogant, selfish, annoying-"

"You prejudiced, argumental, sass mouth-"

"Prat!" She said as she remembered her gift and her hands suddenly dove into her pockets to retrieve the token.

"I will try not to be boring, and anyways when have I ever lied to you?" He said as he struggled to figure out why she was furiously looking through her pockets.

"I don't know, but here!" She hurriedly shoved the green ribbon into his hand.

"I don't think I'll be needing to do my hair or make a dress more fashionable in the trenches Lizzie." He teased as she huffed and took the ribbon and tied it around his wrist.

"It's for luck, you knobhead." She laughed as she kept hold of his hand, their fingers intertwining.

"Lizzie, I think we should talk about the elephant in the train station." His voice was near her ear this time.

She looked up at him, her heart pounding. His eyes looking down at hers ever so seriously. His hands gripped hers tighter. "Yes?" Her voice sounded breathless.

"Green is not really my color."

And then, there they were, two friends who could sometimes barely stand each other, laughing in the middle of a sea of tearful goodbyes and passion filled kisses.

"I am going to…" She stopped speaking.

"I am going to miss you." He said bending down ever so slightly.

"I am going to miss teasing you." She bent her head closer.

"Elizabeth-"

And just like that their lips met with equal force, their hands seeking something they knew they shouldn't. Lizzie's breathy sighs made William feel a rush of pleasure. How he had dreamed of kissing her, holding Lizzie. And then the loud bell of the train came in between their embrace. Their lips fell onto foreheads and dimpled cheeks. All he could think about was wanting more time, needing more time. All she could think about was trying not to cry and being strong. She had always dreamt of marrying her best friend, of loving her best friend. She felt as if the conflict separating them was a guillotine.

"I will miss you. I will write to you. I promise." She felt his cheek, her finger brushing away a tear.

"I promise not to be boring." He could hear people boarding.

"And?"

"I won't get shot at, I won't lie, and I won't be late for our dance."

"Good. Don't miss your train." She smiled as she pecked him on the cheek.

"Always nagging. Just like your mother." He caressed her soft cheek once more.

"When you come back for leave I will make sure you pay for that, William Darcy."

"I will make sure to come back armed." He then pulled her in for a hug and a kiss.

"Goodbye." She could feel her tears streaming down her face.

"I will be back soon. I promise." He kissed her one last time and boarded the train. She stayed on the platform as the train pulled away and became a small speck in the distance. His eyes never left her form as the train rode on, her soft blue dress dancing in the wind.

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Dearest Love,

My feet are cold because my socks are wet. The temperature drops at night, but the memory of your embrace keeps me warm throughout the night. Sometimes gunshots are the only things I hear, the memory of your laughter is the only thing which keeps me sane.

I hope the war ends soon. I can't stand another day not being with you, not seeing you, not kissing you.

What we started at the station was unbelievable. I dream of that day, I yearn for that day.

Now that I have finished waxing poetic about how much I have missed your presence by my side, we must speak of normal things.

How is your family? Your sisters?

The new neighbor with the extremely hairy mole which you described in so much detail in your last letter?

How are you?

I remember you spoke to me of your mother turning Longbourn into a convalescent ward. I wonder how that must be, Longbourn is more than big enough and your family wealthy enough.

Although I do hope you don't fall in love with one of the soldiers you must be nursing back to health. I don't know what I would do if a soldier falls in love with you. I have heard many stories of patients falling in love with their nurses. Should I fall sick in order for your attention?

How is Jane? With Charlie gone she must be in a glum mood everyday except for mail day. I do wonder when they'll get married. I think Charlie is in France. I can't quite remember.

Yesterday, a faulty grenade exploded three trenches down from my own. I was awake and eating those horrible crackers your mother keeps sending me, please tell her I love them, and all of a sudden a large quake shook the ground. Dust went flying, bodies, how I hate to tell you of such atrocities, but you told me not to lie, and to tell you everything. I was struck in the head by a good enough sized rock, I lost a few minutes but woke up soon enough. I promise I am fine, just a slight headache. The crackers were destroyed, so there's the silver lining.

Don't fret over a small bump, my love. You have had far worse falling out of those damn trees you keep climbing. I am quite fine, I have been visited by a doctor and he has pronounced quite well. Attached is a note with his signature for proof.

As always I love you, I miss you, and I need you.

Yours For Quite Some Time

-William Darcy

P.S. Can you please tell your mother to send me more of those blasted crackers? I find I quite miss them now that I don't have them near. Awaiting your letter, as always.


	2. Chapter 2

Planning to update every Wednesday. Please leave your thoughts, I would appreciate it!

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William Robert Darcy,

I understand that since you're miles away you feel as if the distance protects you from my ire. Well, I hope you feel my glare now as you read my letter. You almost perish from this Earth and decide tell me in the last sentences of your letter? You foolish man, how could you make something as a literal bomb going off not more than ten feet away into a small little footnote at the end of your letter? I am extremely happy you weren't horribly hurt, but you can't just drop something like that at the end of your letter!

I won't make a thing of it, I promised Jane.

As to your tedious questions...

The convalescence home is productive and thriving. It has opened my eyes to something I have only read about. Seeing these poor men returning from the horrors of war with one lesser limb was truly shocking. I plead with you now William, return home safe. I care naught if you have one less limb than you did when you left, I only care that you return home safely and alive.

My family is the same as ever. Mary has been praying steadily, Lydia and Kitty are arguing as ever(although the recent growing population of men in the house has made their yells turn to titters and a ridiculous amount of eyelash batting), and Jane as tranquil as a river. Of course, Mama is as she always appears, waving her handkerchief madly and complaining of nerves. Papa is sometimes out of his book room, if only to speak to some of the men, he walks about most days in the garden. The war has made him even more contemplative and silent, he thought it was all over the first time. I also believe some part of him misses you, you were like the son he never had, truly. You have a whole family waiting at home for you, so you better take care of yourself and try not to do anything foolish.

I've had a visit from Georgiana and the whole of Matlock house. Please write more often to your aunt, she worries. Georgiana is well, she has wanted to help the men ever since she set foot in Longbourne, you can easily guess the reason why. Mama has her on the piano, playing soft tunes for the entertainment of those recuperating from wounds not of the head.

Just yesterday our new neighbor with the extremely hairy mole arrived on our doorstep to hand deliver an invitation to his next gathering. In the words of my father, 'Mr. Collins' patroness, one lady something or other was extremely charitable to give him a living and an estate when she passed and he is now fit for the marriage market.' Thankfully, our mother's elated gasps and subsequent planning to marry of Mary were only heard by our immediate family and village.

As for myself, I am as well as I could be. I've been feeling a bit out of sorts lately. Perhaps the reality of what is happening is finally dawning on my ignorant brain or maybe it was just a bad cup of tea. My dour mood obviously cannot be because I miss your boring conversation, arrogant ways, and annoying smile. Alright, maybe it is the reason.

I miss you, and I love you. I've lost count of how many times I've written those words to you. Come home so I could say them to you in person.

Yours As Ever,

Elizabeth Bennet

P.S Mama is sending more of those crackers I've told her you adore.


	3. Chapter 3

**I didn't post last week because I was terribly busy, so I will post two new chapters today. This is five years into the war.**

My Dearest Elizabeth,

Yesterday, I lost a dear friend. Someone who has been by my side since the start, a brother. I can't describe the emptiness I feel in my body. I feel heavy and somehow the time I've spent fighting in this war doesn't seem to matter anymore.

This war has taken my time from you, my family, and now my dear friend. I've been given medals for bravery and courage, and now these trinkets are meaningless to me.

My dearest Elizabeth, I fear that when I return I will not be the same man you fell in love with five years ago. My sleep is often disturbed by nightmares, I can only say are sent from Hell. Sometimes the ringing in my ears gets louder than my thoughts, the imaginary explosions going off like a dreadful symphony. The sun hurts my eyes, the cold hurts my bones.

I looked into the mirror the other day. I was shocked at the sallow skin and dark ringed eyes; I looked so much older than twenty-five. If I come back from this war, I come back half a man. I fear I might never be whole, this war has taken me as well.

I've been hearing rumors of this war finally ending. My dearest, Elizabeth the things I have seen and done.

I want to come home to you, and my family. I want to hold you so close that I forget all that I've seen. I want to make sure you're safe, I want to make sure you're happy.

I am giving you the truth, my darling.

If I return home I promise...I promise to enjoy life and try to make yours better each day.

I am sorry I am here and not with you. I am sorry I am not the same. Please accept me as I am, broken and changed.

I cannot wait to see you again, it's only a matter of time.

-William Darcy


	4. Chapter 4

**As promised, an extra chapter today for last week's missed chapter.**

My Dearest William,

You cannot imagine the pain I felt reading your letter. My heart broke for your loss, I wanted so much to comfort you. To rub the warmth back into your hands and make sure that adorable blush would cover your cheeks.

I wanted so much to somehow appear at your side and kiss your every imagined flaw until you believed that I don't care if you look different.

I just want you.

I spent the last month at Pemberley. One night I ventured into your rooms and I slept in your bed. When I woke I felt your kiss across my lips and imagined your scent in the air. I was so lost when I didn't receive a letter from you for months, but that night I felt as if my heart started beating again.

When you come back, we can start our life. When you come back I will stay by your side and make sure the ringing in your ears is soothed by my voice. When you come back I will make sure the fireplace is kept going in the winter, and I will massage your weary body with love. I will hold you through your nightmares and make sure to replace old memories with new ones.

You are coming back, I have every faith you will keep your promise to return home to me.

Do not doubt my love for you. I love every part of you, old and new, broken and bruised. The man I fell in love with years ago, and the man who I'm still falling in love with now is you, it's always going to be you.

Your Dearest,

Elizabeth


	5. Chapter 5

My Dearest,

I won't expound on the feelings which flooded my body when I read your letter. I will never doubt your love again, I will never doubt you.

I know each new day brings me closer to you, but sometimes I forget. You make me smile, in all this darkness and gloom I imagine you and I smile. A small amount of happiness is all I need from you.

I just want to be home. You are my home, I miss your warmth. I try to imagine your laugh, the sparkle in your eyes, the way you speak as I try to fall asleep. Amidst all the noise, I only hear you.

I imagined you in my old room at Pemberley and I cried at the joy it brought me. I never thought I would be crying from happiness in this torturous prison. And yet the tears came and I laughed so easily the others thought I had gone mad.

The rumors are growing louder, the war is expected to end soon. The New Year is coming, hopefully I can make it to the celebration.

If I don't, and I know you don't want to speak of this outcome, but I want to say a few things.

The first, I have loved you with my whole being from the very beginning. Know that every inch of me has loved you, and now as I write my only regret in dying is leaving you.

The second, you must go on living. Your happiness in life is all I want, find love again, get married to someone deserving, have a life worth living. Live for me.

I don't want your spark to go away. I know it will be hard, but darling I want you to try. I want you to get up everyday, laugh and sing for me. If you're ever missing me, just close your eyes and imagine me by your side.

The last, my family (your father included) they have already received a similar goodbye. I have one request, please make sure your father doesn't keep to his rooms, make sure he lives life as before. Make sure he reads, laughs, and plays with whatever grandchildren he might have in the future. Make the future bright for me.

That is all I want to say.

I wish to be by your side, my Elizabeth.

I recently had a dream. We were both in my grandmother's garden at Pemberley, the gentle sounds of nature surrounding us like a blanket. You were in my arms, laughing and happy. I was myself again and I was teasing you and you were smiling.

If I had one last request it would be to see your smile again, that would be enough.

My love, I'm almost home.

-William Darcy

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 **Hello Readers! I want to personally thank a reader (kaaw, I believe) for her lovely and touching comment. Thank you so much! The next chapter is already written and all I can say is, I'm very sorry (maybe a bit of bribing can make me post it a few days early?) Keep in mind, I plan to make this story ten chapters long. Also, does anyone want to see the letters Darcy wrote to his family members and Elizabeth's father?**

 **(Also, another story that has been getting attention is A Start, that will be updated in JUNE/JULY of 2016.)**

 **One last note, I've been listening to Hamilton as background music, so sorry Lin-Manuel Miranda for stealing a few of your words.**


	6. Chapter 6

Elizabeth went about her day as normally as she would any other. She went into town to check for any letters, there were three. One for her father, one for her from Georgiana, and one for her mother.

She put them in her reticule as she went about the normal errands of the day. She then headed home to deliver the letters.

She went to her father's bookroom and found him staring out the window as he usually did, his mind far away from home.

"Papa, a letter." she said as he jumped in surprise.

"Thank you, Lizzie." His voice raspy and unclear, his hands trembling slightly as he reached for it.

She sat in her usual chair, across from William's dusty one. Her father handed her the pen-knife and they read their letters together, gasped in despair together.

 _Elizabeth,_

 _The War Office delivered the letter and I couldn't believe it myself. We still have hope. He is still alive until confirmed. Missing in Action, he will find his way back to us. We cannot visit you at the moment, Aunt is sick in bed. She will be fine, just the shock I suppose. I apologize for the length, but I find I just cannot believe it. He will be fine._

 _Please visit as soon as you can,_

Then her father's letter...

 _Henry,_

 _William is not dead, that much is true. We would feel it, if he were, we are holding out hope that he is found soon. The War Office informed us yesterday that he was announced Missing in Action after a bombing. We couldn't ride over, Maria has been ill. Henry, I know how much you love our boy, how much he loves you. We are praying he is well._

 _I am sorry I cannot write more, I find my hands are shaking from the shock or the grief I know not which emotion I should be feeling. Our boy will be found._

 _Please visit soon,_

 _-Robert Fitzwilliam_

That day, both father and daughter hugged each other close. Hearts filled in half agony, half hope.

Father thinking of the small boy he helped raise, a boy he thought of as his own son. His boy, lost somewhere, probably hungry and cold. He could feel the pain in his body engulfing him and his legs crumpling to the ground. His daughter, placing him into his chair. He glanced at the place where William had sat. He saw the small boy that stuttered over his words and looked at him with dimpled cheeks and bright eyes. He saw that same boy lying somewhere, lost and cold. He couldn't do anything for his boy, he felt useless.

Daughter thinking of her love, the man who loved her and made her feel so beautiful. He was only missing, he wasn't- he was alive, just missing. She, too, looked over at his place and remembered her playmate, her best friend, the person she teased just to see his blush. She remembered how her heart raced when she saw him on his return from University. How he had changed, how his simple presence made her blood race and her palms sweat. She remembered their goodbye and all their letters. She couldn't do anything for her love, she felt helpless.

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 **Sorry for the late update. Four more chapters to go.**


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